You have heard the mantra: “Fake it Till You Make it”. Today, we want to discuss “Fake it until you Become it” as an option for your Pursuit. Building confidence when you are trying something new or trying to “level up” in life is essential if you want to be successful. No one is successful the first time every time they do something new.

To be successful on your Pursuit, it takes a lot of hard work, grit, and perseverance. The Pursuit also takes a whole lot of “trusting the process”.

Fake it Till You Make It

Amy Cuddy’s TED Talk, “Your Body Language May Shape Who You Are,” explores how body language affects how others see us and how it may also change how we see ourselves. She presents research suggesting that adopting “power poses” – body postures associated with dominance and confidence – can significantly affect our brain chemistry and increase our feelings of power and confidence.

Cuddy explains that holding these poses for just two minutes can increase testosterone levels (associated with dominance) and decrease cortisol levels (associated with stress), thereby enhancing our ability to succeed in stressful situations. She encapsulates this idea with the phrase “fake it till you make it,” encouraging people to adopt confident body language even if they don’t initially feel confident, as this can eventually lead to genuine feelings of confidence and improved performance.

Cuddy also shares a personal anecdote about overcoming a serious car accident and the resulting self-doubt, highlighting how “faking” confidence helped her to eventually “make it” in her professional life. She concludes with an empowering message: to “fake it till you become it,” suggesting that embodying confidence can lead to actual changes in one’s self-perception and capabilities.

Life Transitions

During life transitions, it can be easy to fall into the trap of fear, uncertainty, and doubt governing how we think and feel about ourselves. If we use some of Amy’s strategies during the transition period, we can learn to fake it until we become what we are trying to achieve.

Disclaimer: These strategies are not meant to be advice for how to become a social media influencer who rents luxury vehicles or homes for a photo shoot to build a career on something that is fake.

-Adam R Glendye LPC, CPCS

Building Confidence

Building confidence during a life transition can be challenging, but employing effective strategies can help smooth the process and embrace the grit that you will need while you are in your Pursuit of becoming.

Set Small, Achievable Goals:

• Break down your larger transition goals into smaller, manageable tasks. Achieving these smaller goals can provide a sense of accomplishment and build confidence progressively.
• Track your progress and celebrate small victories to maintain motivation and reinforce positive feelings.

Cultivate a Support Network:

• Surround yourself with supportive friends, family, mentors, or colleagues who can provide encouragement, advice, and constructive feedback.
• Join groups or communities related to your transition where you can share experiences and gain insights from others who have gone through similar changes.

Practice Self-Compassion and Positive Self-Talk:

• Be kind to yourself and acknowledge that transitions are inherently challenging. Allow yourself to make mistakes and learn from them without harsh self-criticism.
• Replace negative self-talk with positive affirmations. Remind yourself of your strengths, past successes, and the progress you are making.

Adopt a Growth Mindset and Power Poses:

• Embrace challenges as opportunities to learn and grow. Understand that abilities and skills can be developed through effort and persistence.
• Use body language to your advantage. As Amy Cuddy suggests, adopting power poses can boost your confidence by altering your body chemistry. Stand tall, take up space, and project confidence through your posture.

Here are 7 other hacks for you to consider on your Pursuit of becoming: