Hey, you. Yeah, you with the coffee in one hand and a list of things todo in the other. Let’s talk. We’re about to get real about something most of us never even realize we’re carrying: generational cycles. Those sneaky little patterns that shape how we love, trust, and exist in the world.
Here’s the tea: just because something’s been passed down doesn’t mean it’s worth keeping. Sure, your grandma’s banana bread recipe? Keep it. But that fear of confrontation or inability to set boundaries? Yeah, that’s gotta go.
This isn’t your grandma’s therapy blog. We’re spilling the truth about the stuff you didn’t ask for but somehow inherited anyway—and how you can break free.
Generational Traumas: What We Carry in Love and Relationships
Let’s break it down. Love and relationships aren’t just about you. They’re shaped by the patterns that have been trickling down through your family for generations.
Here’s what that might look like:
- Not trusting others because, as a kid, your caregiver wasn’t there when you needed them.
- Shutting down emotionally because that’s how your family “solved” problems (or didn’t).
- Carrying fear or shame because no one taught you how to process tough feelings.
Sound familiar? These aren’t just one-time things. They create ripple effects, affecting not just how you show up in relationships but how you parent, how you love, how you live.
But guess what? The cycle doesn’t have to keep spinning. You get to be the one who says, “Enough.”
Step 1: Spot the Cycles (AKA Call It Like You See It)
You can’t break free from what you can’t see. So, let’s start there. What patterns are showing up in your life?
- Are you avoiding conflict because growing up, it always led to yelling or silence?
- Do you struggle to trust your partner because trust was never modeled for you?
- Do you catch yourself parenting in ways that feel way too familiar—and not in a good way?
The first step to freedom is spotting what’s holding you back. Name it. Call it out. Write it down. Bring it into the light.
Step 2: Rewrite the Script
Here’s the thing about family patterns: they’re not your fault. But breaking free from them? That’s on you. And you cando it. Therapy is your cheat code for figuring out what serves you and what doesn’t.
Here’s how to start flipping the script:
- Call It Out: “This isn’t working for me anymore.” Simple, but powerful.
- Reframe It: “What would breaking this cycle look like? How can I show up differently?”
- Practice It: It’s not going to happen overnight, and that’s okay. Small steps are still steps.
You don’t have to have it all figured out today. The point is, you’re starting.
Step 3: Pour from the Overflow
Ever heard the saying, “You can’t pour from an empty cup”? Yeah, that. Therapy helps you fill your cup so you can show up fully—not just for others, but for yourself and with a clean slate and not the old junk from the past.
Because here’s the truth: If you want to give love, forgiveness, trust… you’ve got to have it for yourself first. Therapy isn’t just about healing your past; it’s about building a future where you’re overflowing with all the good stuff.
Why Therapy is the Ultimate Cheat Code
Let’s be real. Therapy is like having the map when everyone else is wandering in the dark. It’s where you start untangling the mess of what’s yours, what’s theirs, and what you’re ready to let go of.
It’s where you realize that not every tradition, behavior, or belief has to keep living rent-free in your life. It’s where you rewrite the story—not just for you but for the generations that come after you.
Let’s Get Real About What’s Next
This is the part where we get curious:
- What’s been modeled for you that feels off?
- What’s worth honoring, and what needs a serious rewrite?
- How can you start showing up differently in your relationships?
Here’s the deal: You don’t have to do this alone. We are here to help you sort through it all—what stays, what goes, and what gets reimagined. Book a session, and let’s dig into your family dynamics.
Resource Alert!
If you’re ready to dig deeper into how your past shapes your present, pick up What Happened to You by Dr. Bruce Perry. It’s like having a therapy session in book form.
Friend, you’re allowed to let go of what doesn’t serve you. You’re allowed to rewrite the story. And you’re allowed to pour yourself into something new—something healthy, something intentional, something yours.
Here’s to breaking free and building something beautiful.
